Hospitality Means Creating a Free Space… -Daily Meditation 9.28.23

Today’s quotation:

Hospitality means creating a free space where the stranger can enter and become a friend instead of an enemy.  Hospitality is not to change people but to offer them space for change.  It is not to bring men and women to our side but to offer freedom not disturbed by dividing lines. –
Henri J.M. Nouwen
Reaching Out

Today’s Meditation:

Some of the most pleasant times in my life have come in the homes of truly hospitable people.  I have spent time with many marvelous people who have been very generous and courteous and have made me feel right at home when I’ve been with them.  That’s the kind of hospitality I strive to practice myself, for when someone visits, I hope they’re completely comfortable and not worried about doing something “wrong” in our home.

We stayed once with some friends of my wife.  They invited us to stay a couple of nights with them while we were traveling cross-country.  They were quite wealthy, had a huge house, and were very nice.  Unfortunately, though, we felt like strangers in their homes every minute, and we were constantly worried about doing something we weren’t supposed to do, messing something up, being in the wrong room at the wrong time, or eating something we weren’t supposed to eat.  We were incredibly relieved to drive away from there.

If we want to be hospitable, we must let others be themselves (with certain limits, of course) and feel free to be themselves.  We give them their space, respect it, and let them know the limits of our space (I wouldn’t want a guest going through the dresser drawers in our bedroom!).  One of the hardest parts of hospitality is giving our guests the opportunity to spend alone time, but it’s not impossible, and planning for any visit is essential.

Being hospitable will look different for each of us, but the universal part of it is reflected in both Henri and Karen’s words–looking to meet our guests’ needs and helping them relax and feel comfortable in our homes.  We should strive to ensure that people leave our homes glad that they came to visit us and not that they’re going.

Questions to consider:

What are some of the more common difficulties of being hospitable?

Why do so many people have problems being hospitable?

What does it mean to be more concerned about the needs of one’s guest than about one’s own needs?

For further thought:

There is a huge difference between “entertaining” and offering hospitality.  Entertaining emphasizes you and how you can impress others.  Offering hospitality focuses on others and strives to meet their physical and spiritual needs so that they feel refreshed not impressed when they leave your home. –
Karen Ehman

If you missed our last Daily Meditation, it is here.