Just Being Ourselves is the Biggest Fear-Daily Devotions 1.6
Today’s quotation:
Just being ourselves is the biggest fear of humans. We have learned to live our life trying to satisfy other people’s demands. We have learned to live by other people’s points of view because of the fear of not being accepted and of not being good enough for someone else.-Don Miguel Ruiz
Today’s Meditation:
Who am I? Isn’t that one of the fundamental questions of our existence in this life, on this planet? It’s a question we all would like to have answered, yet one that we sometimes avoid addressing at all costs as if we were too afraid to find out that we may not be what we want ourselves to be. It’s much easier to be what others want us to be, for then we have criteria upon which to judge ourselves–this person says I’m fine the way I am, so I must be okay. A lack of criteria is a very frightening thing for us.
But we have an inborn desire to be authentic, to be the people we were born to be. We see this desire especially when we’re being someone else–when we’re pretending to like something because someone else likes it when we’re pretending to believe something that others believe so that we’ll fit in when we’re acting in ways that feel awkward and uncomfortable because we think that others expect us to act that way–and we certainly want to meet those expectations, don’t we?
It’s okay to be yourself, and you don’t owe anyone any explanations about your actions or beliefs. If someone’s trying to pressure you to be someone else, then it’s time to question your relationship with that person, not necessarily the way you are. Remember that they may be right in questioning your actions or beliefs because those aspects of yourself may be hurting you. Still, your response to them should be thoughtful and introspective, not a simple rejection or a straightforward acceptance to appease them.
You are good enough, just as you are. You shouldn’t think that you need to be someone other than yourself to make someone else like or accept you–we’re often much better off when certain people don’t accept us, to be honest. Let them go, and move on with your life, continuing to be true to who you are–or spend some time in quiet reflection making sure that you know who that person is–what you consider good and acceptable, and what you consider immoral and unacceptable? What do you love, what do you accept, and what do you desire to do and experience? Ask yourself the questions whose answers will help you to see just who your authentic self is. And love that person completely and unconditionally.
Questions to consider:
How important is it to you to be accepted by others?
What kinds of things do you do to make sure that you’re accepted? Do those things reflect the true you?
Why is it so tempting to be concerned with whether or not other people accept us and want to be with us?
For further thought:
Sometimes we exclude things in ourselves to be like everybody else around us–our ethnicity, our social backgrounds, and our ideas. What kind of world is it that will not allow me to be myself, and is it perfect for me to be there? What part of me will die a slow death if I stay?-Joan Chittister
If you missed our last Daily Meditation, you can find it here.
