People’s Limited Perceptions-Daily Meditation 1.2.2023

Today’s quote

We must not allow other people’s limited perceptions to define us.-Virginia Satir

Today’s Meditation

Sometimes I can’t believe just how much time I’ve spent–wasted–worrying about how other people have seen me, what they’ve thought of me, what they’ve considered me to be, and the value they’ve seen in me.  In my life, I somehow grew up putting a great deal of value in other people’s perceptions of who I am and what I’m worth, even if those people haven’t known much about me at all.

Because of this tendency, I’ve made many decisions based on what other people would think about me and my actions.  I’ve rejected possible relationships because of what other people would think about me if I went out with a certain girl or woman.  I’ve not pursued specific careers because of the judgments that I was sure other people would pass on my choice of profession.  I’ve not pursued specific passions because I didn’t want people to think less of me.

Because of this tendency, I’ve lost many opportunities in my life.  And while I’m not going to spend today regretting what I did or didn’t do yesterday, I know that my life could be much more fulfilling today if I had not worried so much about what others thought earlier.  I wanted to be the person I thought others wanted to see so that they would accept me more fully.  But that acceptance would have been conditional, the worst type of acceptance we can pursue.

I knew a man once who wanted to be a lawyer because that’s what his father expected from him.  His dad had defined him, his likes, dislikes–his very life.  But his dad didn’t have to live that life.

I need to define myself.  My tastes, preferences, passions, likes, and dislikes need to come from me to live a simple and authentic life.  They need to come from my heart and my spirit, not from what I think others want to see in me and from me.  Suppose I allow others to define me and to define who I am. In that case, I’m allowing others to do so from a minimal and distorted position and setting myself up for major disappointment in my life.

Questions to consider:

Who defines who you are?  How is that definition reached? Do you feel people have limited perceptions?

Why do we sometimes give others the power to decide who, what, or how we should be or act?

How can we take back the right and ability to define ourselves?  What will be some of the positive results if we do so?

For further thought on limited perceptions:

There comes a time when you have to stand up and shout:  This is me damn it!  I look the way I look, think the way I think, feel the way I feel, and love the way I love!  I am a whole complex package.  Take me… or leave me.  Accept me – or walk away!  Do not try to make me feel like less of a person just because I don’t fit your idea of who I should be, and don’t try to change me to fit your mold.  If I need to change, I alone will make that decision.  When you are strong enough to love yourself 100%, good and bad–you will be amazed at the opportunities that life presents you.-Stacey Charter.

If you missed our last Daily Meditation, you can find it here.