Taking Forgiveness to the Next Level-Shared Heart Newsletter
Dear Shared Heart Friends,
Taking Forgiveness to the Next Level with Barry and Joyce Vissell.
Spiritual Chanting March 24, 7-8:30 pm, FREE
A remarkable 90 minutes of singing, chanting (mainly in English), and opening your hearts to the divine. Join Barry and Joyce with guest musicians. Center for Spiritual Living, Santa Cruz
The Greatest Journey April 19-23
Find and live your dream, your passion, and your purpose! Individually and together with a small, carefully chosen group of 8-14 participants (singles or couples), these 6 months will help you recreate your life.
Summer Couples Retreat June 22-25
Would you like your relationship to reach a new level of love, healing, intimacy, and commitment? Couples describe these weekends as a safe and loving place to learn and practice new skills for their relating.
We are excited to offer our FREE album of sacred songs and chants, “I Stand for Love,” our first musical recording. You can download the whole album for free or listen to it on YouTube. Wait till you hear the exquisite harmonies added by our son, John-Nuri.
Free Album Download
Listen on YouTube
Taking Forgiveness to the Next Level
Excerpt from this month’s article: “Love keeps no record of wrongs.”
Our latest book: Heartfullness: 52 Ways to Open to More Love, is available only on Amazon.com as a Kindle e-book for only $5.99 (or paperback for $15.95). Read what one reviewer says:
“I love love love this book!! For me, it is like a thought for the day … I read — then carry that nugget of love, joy, or peace to ponder and bathe in throughout the day, –or even take into my meditations!! Such a treasure !! priceless!” –Trish Turpel
Here’s the link: https://www.amazon.com/Heartfullness-Ways-Open-More-Love-ebook/dp/B081K926GY
Unbelievable Book Sale: To Really Love a Woman and To Really Love a Man (each regular price $15.95) now $15 for both with free shipping; and if you buy both, as a bonus, just $3 each (and free shipping) for as many as you want of the following books: The Shared Heart, Models of Love, Risk To Be Healed, Rami’s Book, Light in the Mirror, and A Mother’s Final Gift. Please call Paris at 831-684-2130 to order.
Shared Heart Column
Heartfulness March 2023
with Joyce and Barry Vissell
“Taking Forgiveness to the Next Level”
Much has been written about forgiveness and how it blesses the forgiving person. I hope to add another aspect that is very important in the journey of complete forgiveness.
Corrie Ten Boom is one of my heroes. She was a Dutch woman living during the time World War Two. She and her family felt it was wrong for their Jewish neighbors to be taken to camps. They built elaborate hiding places in their home for their Jewish neighbors. They knew it was precarious and that they could be taken to the concentration camps themselves if caught, but they felt so strongly that they did this for several years.
They were finally caught. Corrie, her sister and best friend, Betsie, and their elderly father were all taken to the concentration camp and tortured. The father died within the first week, and Betsie died later on. Both women were beaten and starved by the German soldiers.
At the end of the war, Corrie was released. She found her way to some kind people who helped her regain her strength and health. Corrie decided to dedicate her life to helping other people like herself who had been terribly treated and were now homeless, wandering the streets like lost souls. These people had nothing. All that they owned was sold to other people while they were in the camps.
Corrie went on a mission to create homes for these war victims. Since there were no funds for such a plan, she set about fundraising herself by giving talks. At one talk, she recognized the man who had repeatedly tortured her. She approached him, and he started to shake as he felt ashamed of himself for what he had done to her. Though this was very difficult for her, she reached out to and forgave him, stating that all were victims of the war. The man got down on his knees and, through copious tears, thanked her and said he had not been able to sleep once the war was over, and he fully realized the inhumane things he had done. Corrie demonstrated courage in being able to forgive this man. But something happened that was even harder for her.
She was doing tours all over Europe, speaking about the concentration camps and what had really happened within them. She had a manager who collected all the money and organized the tours. Corrie worked for almost a full year. She was exhausted and felt she had made enough money for her special homes for the refugees. She went to her manager to collect all of the money. At this point, she realized that this manager had spent all the money on herself and her family. There was no money left. All of Corrie’s dreams and work to raise money were in vain. There was now nothing left for the refugees. Corrie could not forgive this person for what she had done.
One day, a very close friend visited Corrie. Corrie told her friend in detail all that had happened, and then she showed her all the receipts of the money that had been raised and then spent by this woman. Corrie kept these receipts in a box under her bed. Corrie’s friend told her, “You must burn those receipts to be free. You are hanging on to this injustice, and it is keeping you a prisoner.”
Corrie objected, “But this is my proof!” Her kind friend said, “God knows about this. Now you must let this go, as these receipts keep you bound to this injustice.”
Together, they burned the receipts, and Corrie felt a lightness she had not felt in a long time. She had been able to forgive the prison guard for torturing her, but not the woman who kept money that was designated for helping people in need.
In her mind, Corrie had kept a record of the wrongs done to her by this woman. She even kept the physical records. True forgiveness requires that we also let go of all the records. A line from 1 Corinthians 13 says, “Love keeps no record of wrongs.”
In my own life, there is a person who has done an injustice toward Barry and me. We pray for this person daily, and in my heart, I have felt love and compassion for how this person acted and continues to act. In my mind, I feel that I have forgiven this person, but I still think about every single detail of the injustice. Therefore, I have not fully forgiven. My work on myself is to let go of the details, the records I have been keeping. I know I will be totally forgiven when I can let go of the records. I can sense the feeling of freedom that will come. I must be honest with myself and realize I am not quite there. I have not forgiven entirely as long as I cling to the records. But I am working on this. I know that complete forgiveness is a gift that I will give to myself.
I encourage all of you to do this same inner work of forgiveness and allow yourself to be free. If it took Corrie Ten Boom several years to be able to burn those records, I have hope for all of us that we also can forgive completely without keeping records. It is so worth this inner work.
Joyce & Barry Vissell, a nurse/therapist and psychiatrist couple since 1964, are counselors near Santa Cruz, CA, who are passionate about conscious relationships and personal spiritual growth. They are the authors of 9 books and a new free audio album of sacred songs and chants. Call 831-684-2130 for further information on counseling sessions by phone, online, or in person, their books, recordings, or schedule of talks and workshops. Visit their website at SharedHeart.org for their free monthly e-heartletter, updated schedule, and inspiring past articles on relationships and living from the heart.
Our schedule at a glance (details below — All events are now in-person):
March 24: Spiritual Chanting and Singing
April 19-23: The Greatest Journey (Mentorship Program)
June 22-25: Summer Couples Retreat
Quote of the Month about Taking Forgiveness
“We can learn how to forgive through experiencing children’s forgiveness of us.” –Models of Love, p. 40
Please join Joyce and me in holding a vision of a world where women, men, and children of all nations, races, and religions can see and feel the divine in themselves and one another. Here is our current 2023 workshop schedule. Joyce and I would love to see you at one of these events. Please remember how vital this spiritual-emotional growth work is. Together let’s take another step on this journey into the heart of love and deeper awareness, where real-world healing begins. Peace be with you all.
March 24: Spiritual Chanting and Singing
A remarkable 90 minutes of singing, chanting (mainly in English), and opening your hearts to the divine. Join Barry and Joyce with guest musicians. If you are a musician, please bring an instrument and join us.
When: Friday, March 24, 2023, 7-8:30 pm
Where: Center for Spiritual Living, 1818 Felt St, Santa Cruz, CA
Cost: FREE or Love offering to support CSL.
April 19-23: The Greatest Journey (Mentorship Program)
Find and live your dream, your passion, and your purpose! Individually and together with a small, carefully chosen group of 8-14 participants (singles or couples), these 6 months will help you recreate your life.
June 22-25: Summer Couples Retreat
Would you like your relationship to reach a new level of love, healing, intimacy, and commitment? Couples describe these weekends as a safe and loving place to learn and practice new skills for their relating.
July 21-23: Esalen Couples RetreatLearn skills to dramatically improve your relationship while luxuriating at one of the most uniquely beautiful retreat centers we have ever visited.
Volunteers Needed. The Shared Heart Foundation needs volunteers. If you would like to support our vision and work, no matter where you live, email: info@sharedheart.org
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Counseling with the Vissells. For individuals or couples who need help, you can choose from one hour to a two-day intensive with either one or both of us. https://sharedheart.org/counseling/
An easy way to support The Shared Heart Foundation. Now you can support us with every Amazon order you make. Just go to https://smile.amazon.com, sign in like you usually do, specify The Shared Heart Foundation (you only have to do this once), and 0.5% of every order supports us. Thank you for this support.
Our love and blessings to you all,
Barry and Joyce Vissell
Please click on SharedHeart.org for inspiring articles about relationships and consciousness and our updated schedule.
